Category Archives: Satire

Rockies’ 2016 Attempt to Ruin Baseball in Denver

It’s a new Spring, and the Rockies are coming off another disappointing campaign, at least for the owners. They are disappointed because their 2015 efforts fell short of their ultimate goal – to make the Colorado Rockies the worst team … Continue reading

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Rockies’ Opening Day 2014 Sucked

Baseball Opening Day in Denver has been getting worse every year and 2014 was no exception. Continue reading

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Rockies’ Management Presents 2012 Excuses

The Baseball Observer attended numerous Bears games at Mile High Stadium and never heard anyone, from fans to reporters, to players to team management, complain about how difficult it was to play baseball at altitude. Continue reading

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2011 Was a Rocky Year for the Rockies – What Next?

After the second disappointing year in a row, what can loyal fans of the Rockies expect in the future? More of the same, because the Monfort brothers are uneilling and incapable of doing any better. Yes fans, your team owners are running your team more as a pleasant diversion, a hobby if you will, rather than a serious enterprise. They just want to keep it going on a subsistant level so they can pass it on to their kids to amuse them for their lifetimes. The only time they went to the World Series was a total fluke, ended quickly by a serious team, the Boston Red Sox. You see, Boston, like most other baseball teams, is owned and run by professional sports managers who intend to win or know the reason why.

Yes, folks, our Rockies are just a fun pastime for a couple of accidental millionaires who made their money the old fashioned way – they inherited it. They got control of the Rockies the old fashioned way, too – through political corruption, greed and avarice. Some of it was not actually the Monforts, but they benefitted from the illegal activities and financial philanderings of the original owners, led by Mickey “Mouse” Monus. In order to keep the franchise in Colorado somebody who’s reputation was at least not totally sullied had to step forware. Thus the Monforts and Jerry Mc were recruited and practically given the team because they weren’t convicted criminals and appeared to have a lot of money. Jerry later had his own financial problems and was rousted by the Monforts who took total control over the team – the rest is history. Continue reading

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Denver’s Mayor Hickenlooper Responds to Rockies’ Multi-Million Dollar Ripoff of Denver’s Taxpayers!

April 9, 2010. According to the Denver Post, the Mayor of Denver, John Hickenlooper, said of the Rockies: “They’re going to the World Series, and I will put their flag on top of City Hall, dye my hair purple for … Continue reading

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