It's not often that a newspaper columnist writes a column where every sentence is wrong. But if anyone could do it, Mark Kiszla would certainly be the most likely, and as you will see below, he nearly did it. The offending article appeared in the Sunday, August 27, 2006 Denver Post. Ironically, Kiszla announced over a year ago that he would no longer be writing about the Rockies. If only he had kept his word.
Yes, that was the title of the article. We thought it was an unfortunate spelling error, too, but if it was, he repeated it on the web site. In any case, he is right, in a way, because merely scraping Hurdle isn't going to have an effect, whereas scrapping Hurdle would probably be a good move.
Pretty dramatic, but totally meaningless and actually quite wrong. Clint plays the lovable old hayseed to the hilt, while always maintaining a positive attitude without a hint of frustration. The fans in Denver are certainly frustrated, but according to every poll we have ever seen or conducted, very few blame Hurdle. Everyone knows Clint has the job because he is a "Yes Man" for the Monforts, who continue to think they are baseball geniuses, and drive out any manager that thinks he knows more than they do, like Buddy Bell and Jim Leyland, both of whom have found successful employment with other teams. When the Baseball Observer thinks of frustration, Kiszla's picture is more likely to appear than Hurdle's.
Kiszla needs to check his Denver sports history. Those people are right, Clint.
How is 5-2 a thumping? Who are these detractors, anyway? Probably Kiszla and his compatriots in the press box. The blame is clearly in the owner's lap, but firing O'Dowd and Hurdle would be a good start. A better one would be to fire themselves.
A news flash from Kiszla? That would be a news flash.
Firing Hurdle wouldn't fix the Rockies, but it might if it meant that the Monforts have finally emerged from their ego-driven fog and are ready to turn the baseball operations over to some baseball people who really know what they are doing.
It's not on Mark's first page because he prints really, really big with his crayons.
Hurdle makes a lot less than most managers already. How is firing him going to reduce costs? Maybe they could go without a manager.
[This is the answer to the question.]
What numbers is Kiszla crunching? It would be interesting to know which numbers indicate the convenience of scapegoats in an organization.
What fans? And, the last time I looked, the Rockies were making pretty good use of their bats.
These statements are both absolutely wrong. Why would firing Clint suggest that the players are better than they are? It would actually suggest the opposite, that management has finally realized that when you don't have overwhelming talent, you can still win if your team is well-managed, disciplined, has a strategy for victory, and plays like a team. Hurdle doesn't bring any of that, and I don't know if he can even bounce a baseball, either. Anyway, with the humidifier, they don't bounce.
So, lots of things are further from the truth.
The trouble is, the talent keeps bursting out and playing for other teams, while the Rockies keep the guys who would otherwise be career minor leaguers.
Very few people could be as stupid as you, Mark, so don't worry about it.
This is a poplar refrain among brainless sportscasters in Denver, and really explains why things are the way they are. If the Rockies ever get decent owners, they will find that there are a lot more people in this town that care about baseball than fans of exhibition football games.
What does it matter who goes first? Both men are just lackies, doing what the Monforts tell them to. They should all be shown the door. But that won't be enough - someone would have to open it for them.
Not to belabor the point, but the Humidor is probably the worse thing anyone has ever done in the baseball arena in this town. Since they started using the humidor, the Rockies have lost like never before, attendance is the lowest in history, the games are boring, and other teams are complaining. How is any of that good? As a matter of fact, if their is a face of baseball frustration in Denver, it must look a lot like a humidor.
Nobody confuses Kiszla with a competent sportswriter, either.
Any Rockies player that looks like a star will be gone as soon as they can be a free agent regardless of who there agent is. The Monforts simply will not pay to keep them. They are in it for the money, and they certainly aren't going to give it to the players, especially after seeing what Helton's salary has done to their bottom line. As for Holliday, he is a fairly good hitter and a mediocre fielder who can't seem to keep his head in the game, constantly making dumb mistakes that will probably keep his income down and end his career prematurely.l
As the Baseball Observer has always said, Leyland was, by far, the best manager the Rockies have ever had. Kiszla, of course, did nothing but criticize him and claim he was washed up back then. How does that look now, when he is leading the Detroit Tigers to the best record in baseball? Leyland is the best of example of why these people, the Monforts, McGregor, O'Dowd and their co-conspirators have no business running a baseball team. When you pay several million to a sure Hall of Famer, respected by everyone in baseball, and then don't let him do what he does best because you think you know more, especially in the face of mountains of evidence to the contrary, you have a problem that probably can't be cured. Leyland's success is making Kiszla and everyone over at Coors Field sick, and we couldn't be happier.
There is no way to pardon Hurdle right now. If he were capable of coaching this team to the playoffs, he would do it, because nobody would ruin their career and jeopardize their future just to please a bunch of morons who have lost their grip on reality. Hurdle has been trying his best to get a victory and create some credibility for himself, but he can't do it. The big meltdown is coming, Hurdle will be gone once he loses it and starts flaming everyone in the organization to try to save what little reputation he has.
If Monfort believes he has talent, he's to dumb to breath without a tutor. The fact is, he knows exactly what they have, but thinks he can fool all of the rest of us into keeping the revenue flowing. Monfort and Hurdle couldn't win if they were given all of greatest players who ever lived at the prime of their careers. They just don't know how to do it, never have and never will.
This is just crazy talk. Maybe Kiszla likes Hurdle, but there has never been any indication that he has any coaching or managerial talent whatsoever. If he had the right hitting coach, Hawpe could hit lefties. If he had the right pitching coach, Cook would probably win more games. Manager is the weakest position on this team, without a doubt. Those other guys show they can play their positions every day, but who can tell if Clint even shows up?
If Hurdle is the best thing they have at those positions, it is much worse than anyone imagined.
But who would ever want to reach this guy? He doesn't know anything, but isn't afraid to display his ignorance. A deadly combination.